When you just recovered an almost concussion and your husband, while watching your ipad in bed, almost hits you with his elbow at the very point where last week still was this huge botox...
The microphone and I go along way back (I mean a looooong way); we met when I was approximately two and since then I’ve got this protruding arm movement which has the tendency swishing...
Little children from the daycare center being entertained by bored looking actually SuperStars-wannabe girls tempting to push a segway daycare child transport full of also bored kids through town
Although this picture insinuates I have been vomiting in my own lap because I looked at my husband when he just yawned in my face; it’s not.
hardly recovered from my almost chopped off thumb adventure; I now woke up without a thumb: it just fell off last night
Is everything alright James? Are you maybe slightly a bit sicky? Do I need to call you? What have I done to you? Is it my nose? Or maybe I’m too crazy? Or because I know Justin Bieber. I don’t know. How can we solve this?
After a weekend of high fever and also a sick husband and sick cat; the new week started on Monday, 5 o’clock in the morning at the sound of what looked like a huge...
When you say ‘hi’ to a towel
I have been nice to people for a really long time (my whole life), unless you mess with me, then I’ll mess back; but now (I mean in the context of I’ve really woken...
So once in a while I feel very important on Twitter. I should be; I am there since the last 10 years. I am a total Twitter-veteran with the lowest Tweet volume ever. Anyway...
Dear WhoEver made this earth,
Amazing accurate but snotty review of this smelly, suffocating, crime-fashion Black-Hooligan-Snot-Camouflage-outfit thing
This is how it looks like when your husband just saved your entire family from a flying projectile that flew towards your kitchen window
They ignored me and I wasn’t even looking arrogant!
The whole week turned out to become a week of all horrific dead bear sounds, sucking iPhone battery ghosts, creepy feelings and flying illuminated bulgy eyes all over the place.
Daughter sent me a DM with this pic of a long ear rabbit. Thing. Looks like a tremendously depressed pet who flew too much and now his ears need some time out or even...
Rough copy of casual situation when I went into the Christmas shop while husband is getting the car to go home.
Open letter to the Christmas tree terrorist
I didn’t want have to do anything with this and made sure I stayed yards behind him yelling loud and pointing at him “he is stealing a bicycle!!!!